You did it wrong.

There seems to be a common problem with me doing things wrong here. Darn it. I'm trying to learn. Luckily, you guys don't have to deal with my frustrations to learn about all the differences here. Let's see, what have I been doing wrong?

ELEVATORS - I know this might seem like a small thing, but I really haven't had much experience with elevators in my life. I seem to always press the wrong button or hop on the wrong elevator. People pile into elevators here. It's expected to hold the door for peeps. I think I have the idea down, but I always do it wrong. Don't most elevators open if they sense something in the door area? I keep trying to hold the elevator by pressing against the door. Apparently that doesn't work in all of the lifts here. You have to press the button on the inside. I've gotten at least one weird look for screwing this up.

BUS STATION - Geez-ca-geez. I did it wrong. This was an experience. For some reason, I expected to be able to take the metro to the bus station, hop on, and go to Vina last friday. It wasn't that simple at all. As soon as I saw the crowd, I realized that I should have expected this. There was an ocean of people and seemingly no order. It was like something that I've seen in the movies.

I followed a kid who looked like he knew what he was doing. I don't think I look lost though. We stood in line for like 20 minutes. After awhile a man came by shouting "Vina!". "Yes, that's me," I thought, "What do I do now?" He directed me to wait in another waiting area with a small crowd of people and some street dogs. I waited there another 20 minutes or so as he checked back in everyone once in awhile saying we were to leave very soon.

Finally, he returned and told us to move to another location to wait. This area was outside the normal bus terminal. It seemed a little weird, but everyone else was going with it. They seemed fine. A bus pulled up and everybody ran, literally RAN, to hop onto it. There was even a fence in the way that we all had to jump over. I was laughing on the inside, trying to act cool on the inside, and kinda nervous all the way around. I made it over the fence and onto the bus ok. It definitely wasn't built for North American bodies. Luckily, a lady let me sit in the aisle seat so I could put my legs in the walkway. Otherwise, I wouldn't have fit. The bus is what they refer to as a "micro".

When I recounted my story to the person I was meeting in Vina, he told me that what I had taken was a "pirate bus". Haha. Arrrrrrrgh. I learned that the legit buses are MUCH MUCH nicer than the pirated ride. I got to take that on the way back and everything was fine.

My new coin holder with Chilean pesos. I use the wrong change sometimes.

METRO TICKET COUNTER- I can´t seem to figure this one out either. I did it wrong. There are different prices during the day depending on traffic. I think I understand that part. What I haven't been able to figure out is why it's like $600 one day at 5:15 and $520 the next day at 5:10. I try to have the right amount ready and wait for change if I need it. They always look at me funny like I"m doing it wrong. It's impossible to talk to these folks because there is so much noise and they have absolutely no patience. I just try to give them as little as possible and be on my way. I should really buy a card that I can reload and swipe at the entrance. I'll get on that this weekend. Thanks for the reminder.

MAKE PLANS - Because I'm not very good at talking on the phone, I don't have wifi when I'm out and about, and I don't know the city that well, I try to make plans to go places or meet people beforehand. Apparently this just isn't done here. I´m doing it wrong. I was almost yelled at one time for trying to set up a time frame to meet the next day.

It's also not appropriate to ask people what they're up to on any given day? The response is "Why? What do you want from me? I don't owe you anything" I'm just trying to be nice and practice speaking. Sorry.

WORK LIGHT SWITCHES - This would seem easy, wouldn't it? Well, I keep doing it wrong. The switches are opposite here. I guess that makes sense because I'm on the bottom of the world. They flip down to turn on and up to turn off. The ones in my apartment are installed sideways. I always flip the wrong switch and/or in the wrong direction.

the lightswitches that I always do wrong.

ORDERING IN RESTAURANTS - I go out to eat as infrequently as I can, but it still happens every once in awhile. I always do it wrong. I haven't been able to understand a single word that any waiter has spoken. Usually, I have no idea what I am ordering and am always surprised by the bill. I have got to figure this one out.

Hydroponic lettuce. Just because.

WATCHING OUT FOR TRUCKS - There's a lot of construction in my neighborhood right now. I learned today that they don't go BEEP when they back up. Oopsie doopsie. I crossed the street right behind one while he was backing up. It was a bit close, but I didn't get hit. I did it wrong.

PALABREAR - This is a chilean word that means "to joke around with friends". My company this weekend frequently referred to each member of the gang as "Fatty" although none of them were. I don't know if I speak well enough to start accusing people of being overweight in a joking manner just yet. I don´t want to do it wrong.

A random reciept. I probably did it wrong when purchasing whatever I did here.

Finally, something they do "wrong". When taking a picture, they sometimes use the english word, "smile". However, it's pronounced "esmee-lay". I don't know if they do this on purpose or just don't know how to say it correctly. Either way, it's funny.

I hope you learned lots. Bonus for the day : http://youtu.be/nr8H6Lx4YNI This music video was filmed a couple blocks from where I live. I was just there today. Stay tuned.